No Sun Day

Written on 11th of December 2011

Sunday. Not much of sun today. Sad. I want me sun. Anyway, woke up late. So many dreams that I couldn't even remember any of them.

Yan and I went for brunch at hong kee in taipan. The food was brilliant! A bit pricy though. And then we walked around. It's so nice to just walk around instead of driving. Haven't been walking on the street. And then we went Empire. I saw the love of my life. A 1200bucks Ed Hardy sunny!!! And it's got 40% discount. I'm dying to get it. But its too pricy. How would I afford to buy? It's insane! I'm still thinking about it. I really love it. Butterflies in my stomach just thinking about it. He's one in a billion.

Quit that first. Just now on my way back after dropping Yan off at LRT station, I was so blue. I nearly cried. Jeez!

Then I decided to go to Sunway Pyramid to kill time. No cute guys. Anyway, I got myself a POPCORN set. Yum yum yum! And then then came back and watch Hachiko.

Gosh, my tears ran down like a leaking tap. I swear I couldn't feel it and the tears just ran down my face like that. It's so sad to see him like that. His owner died and never came back. But the dog doesn't know. How could it possibly know? And now I'm worrying about my tortoises. What am I gonna do with them when I die?

At night I saw this reality show called bachelorette. Gosh! Those guys are hawt! William is so cute. Watching the show makes me feel so lonely. Becoming desperate. Wish to have a bf. Dang! Maybe Mr Right is waiting for me at Simple Plan's concert. Let's be positive.

Happy Thoughts =)

Had a great chat with L earlier this morning. More like midnight. Chatted for 2 hours till 5 in the morning. He's always got this something to keep me awake even when I'm dead tired. Prolly cuz we're too similar. It's always nice to talk to him. Like talking to the younger me. Hahahaha I always joke about how we might be long lost cousin. How can two human beings have so much in common. Just weird. Especially our thinking about relationships and how picky we both are. DANG!

So he was telling me about this girl he's just met and how he wants to confess to her but fear that she will reject him. I guess this girl really is very special and must be really pretty too. Actually I felt honored to hear all these cuz telling me all these meant he trusts me. I'm happy for him but at the same time I'm sad for him because he's such a pessimist. Well bro, if you keep thinking that it's not gonna work out and all you really are gonna be forever alone.

Earlier, I was reading back what I wrote in this blog. Hahahahaha I didn't realize I was such an awesome writer. I can't believe all the things I've written. Like a pro. Especially the quotes I wrote to Berry and Yan about relationship using tornado tsunami as metaphor. I didn't quite remember that. Many other things too. I was sad, I was happy, I WAS ON CLOUD NINE WHEN SIMPLE PLAN ALBUM WAS RELEASED! Great moments. Awesome memories. Looking back could be so much fun.

I'm reading a book title Always The Bridesmaid. Gosh this book is driving me nuts. I wonder if Amy is going to end up alone or not. Damn! She's such a bitch in that book I couldn't stand reading the book cuz it's using first person. It's all me, myself and I. It's like I'M the bitch. Gosh! Unbelievable! I dowanna be like her. One thing about this book it's that it kinda introduced places to me. Such as Rome's attraction. Colosseum, St. Peter's (need to climb 500++ steps to reach the top but there's nice view up there), the Pantheon... AMAZING places. I wanna go Rome already =(

Anyway, it's going to be a long day tomorrow. Gonna go to bed earlier and travel to Subang again. DAMN! Don't you just hate travelling? Need to pack up pack up~

Thinking too much again...

At some point of your life, you just wanna be loved. Whether or not it's for a short period of time, you just want someone you could give all the love in the world to. There's been alot going through my mind lately, like whether do I go flirt around with that 'Canadian' guy or should I just sit there and wait till Mr. L to realize it. Well, of cuz it'd be awesome if he finds out and he likes me back (and this is like probability of 0.01) yet there's alot I need to worry about. But if I were to go for that 'canadian' guy, I dunno where will that heads to. I definitely am afraid of commitment with guys like that (well I said I was just gonna fling) just in case things get serious cuz he's a damn jerk! Grrrrhhh! Mr.L please tell me if you like me the way I like you :(

Hmm....... Wait till I get back to KL.

To the left or to the right?

Am I too young to stop doing reckless things? 
Or am I too old for yet another love game?
Should I be waiting for the right train before I hop in?
Or should I just take the next train to nowhere?
Are you the one that I will spend my happily ever after with?
Or is he gonna be my next conquest?

Sitting on the bus looking through the window,
Then I close my eyes and all I see is the shape of your smiling face.
How did I fall for you?
Why it happened so quickly I didn't get to stop it?
I hated myself for being so easy,
But the fact that you're a package of everything I want fascinates me.
How could you fit so perfectly for me?
Why did you sneak in when I was throwing my cautions to the wind?
I love you and I wanna be with you.
Reality tells me it's time to move on but my heart's telling me to wait.

So whether do I learn to be a bitch/slut,
Or stay who I am till you feel my love?
The answer is pretty clear.
But at certain point I just wanna do reckless things I might regret.
Life is short.
Who knows it's 10 years later when you realize?
In the end I'm still debating with myself,
Stuck in dilemma waiting for yet another drama.

When is tomorrow?

It's funny how people say tomorrow will be a better day... does life get better and better? Don't wanna sound like a pessimist but I can't help but wonder why people say that? Looking at the world sometimes tears me down. I used to cry for what the world has slowly turned into. Is tomorrow still gonna be as good as yesterday or today, that is still a question mark.

Just some random thoughts. Oh well, maybe being a psycho is a better choice after all. They don't care what's going on and all. Peace out!

Simple Plan is Love!

Inspired by Simple Plan. It's June 21st already!!! I can't believe it... I'm gonna get my Simple Plan Get Your Heart On! soon. I'm so excited!!!

Too bad I couldn't write essay long at this moment cuz I'm super busy. Maybe I'll blog again when I've gotten my copy of GYHO.

Till then. ROCK ON!

Too little too long...

"难过是因为闷了很久..."

I couldn't agree more. I have been single FOREVER. Sometimes I really wanna feel loved. Not love from God, family or friends, but from a boyfriend. Although I can't see myself having a boyfriend, getting into serious relationship and all yet, deep down, I wanna be the innocent, blur girlfriend.

Sometimes things and people life leads you the wrong way. You kept going didn't know where you're heading to until you hit a hole or run into a rock. That's when you wake up from your dream, with bruises and pain, tears and sadness.

I really really was so sure that I've found the one. So sure that I just sit there waiting for it to happen. So sure that I keep praying to God like a little girl promising God she'll be a good girl so that she'll get some rewards like candies or something. But now I really am uncertain anymore. Not that I'm doubting God but things just got clearer and clearer. The more I know, the more I sink. The hollowness in my heart got deeper and deeper I can barely breathe.

Guess it's true that to make your dreams come true, first you'll have to WAKE UP. Listening to Britney's "From the bottom of my broken heart". Kinda felt some parts of the song. Accidentally shed a tear. One sided love sucks.

Alright, it's time to move on. But it's been 4 months, I dunno how am I gonna deal with this one this time........